Parenting Porcupines

Bubbles and Boundaries Part 1

Episode Summary

Recognizing the patriarchy and its role in perpetuating inequalities by visiting some of its more harmful habits.

Episode Notes

Full show notes on the blog here.

This is about patriarchy, purity culture (and the toxicity thereof), and how we talk to and teach our kids about boundaries (sexual or otherwise).

Let’s start with a few truths:

1. Patriarchy is a social construct that values men over women, boys over girls, and relegates women and children to the lesser position after Father and Husband. It is not Christian — it exists in non-Christian culture; it is not American — it exists in Asian, African, Middle Eastern, and European cultures as well.
2. To identify patriarchy and want to reject it, in your home, your relationships, and especially with your children, does not mean you do not value men, love your male partners, friends, and children, or that you want to be asexual or homosexual.
3. Patriarchy is not just damaging to women and girls, it is the source of toxic masculinity, it puts an unfair burden on men to provide, lead, and make decisions on their own, without the benefit of partnership with their wives.

That said, there are a dozen manifestations of patriarchy that are so damaging as to be handicapping to children. In this episode we are taking on one specific one, courtesy of our guest, Cayce LaCorte, whose viral TikTok rant on virginity being a construct of the patriarchy got her noticed by, among others, Buzzfeed.

Welcome, Cayce, to the show.